This track has been submitted for your friendly, constructive criticism. What useful feedback can you give the artist? The floor is yours to talk about the track and how they can fix problems in and improve upon the mix and the song.
Description of the track:
A first demo mix for my (maybe?) 80s pop-rock project. It's not necessarily the best off the project, but it's the first I finished mixing and I think it can hold its own.
It's about insomniac midnight reveries, in the heat of summer, above the quiet city, when melancholia blends with vague hopes for what the future may hold. No special reason, just written it because it came to me.
It was recorded and mixed in Reason Essentials 1.5 and Audition 3 for a little compression and eq on the master wave file. Hohner LG90 guitar, an old former bass guitar, a Shure C606 microphone, freeware and demo .sf2's available on the net, and an Audigy 2 Platinum soundcard.
I really hope you will like it. And would very much appreciate your comments on both the "mix" and the song.
Thank you very much! I'm sure you know how much it would mean. I'll come up with more songs as I finish mixing them. All the best!
Artist's website: myspace.com/tryggvasson
This isn't the first version of the song they submitted. After making some improvements to the original track, they resubmitted the version you heard above. If you're interested, here is the original version, along with the changes/improvements made. How do you feel about the changes?
What was changed:
- turned the xylophone louder - to match it with the hi-hat;
- turned the hi-hats a bit lower - too many highs;
- made the organ more audible;
- cut some highs on the guitars;
- brought the strings on the intermezzo and coda a bit forward;
- piano a bit louder;
- tweaked some EQ on the master wave: gave the bass a little more depth, made the kick heavier (unfortunately this also made the organs a bit muddier, but still prefer this to the previous version, because I think it has more warmth and roundness).
When the night hangs in the balance
And the heat grows like a weed around your skin,
When the Moon sinks the city into silence,
The smallest breath of wind stirs all the wakes within.
When the night hangs like a shadow
And the Moon punctures the veil, a silver stain,
Woken yearnings paint the white in golden yellow
And rise up like butterflies, into the flame.
Hiding everyday, falling every night in the shadow,
Learning to survive, the story of your life outspoken…
You were never afraid, but nothing can stay in the shadow,
You can remember the time when nothing in your life was broken.
When the night lies in the balance
And the Moon breaks heart’s guarded gates,
In the long breath between the evenings and the mornings,
That is when you hear the calls of nameless fates.
When the night hangs low…
When the night hangs low…
Have a listen to the track and offer your constructive criticism for this Workshop in the comments section. Feel free to offer any type of advice - arrangement, mix, lyrics, performance. And remember to play nice - be constructive!
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